You’re no picnic yourself buddy
And your behavior is that of a bratty cunt…You literally argue with me for 5 days about whether or not I went to jail. It’s mind-boggling.
Hope you get better as well, but it’s a mild hope at best…honestly neither of us gives a shit…So why say that? Go Canes blah blah blah
I’m fine. Hope you get better
Well you’re not fine lol
You argued with me for 5 days about shit I already proved to you, about soccer, about whether or not I went to jail…Think about that. Fuck is wrong with you? You clearly aren’t fine
Why is he spelling it ghey?
Is this some new type of p.c. fake liberal solution?
Nothing is wrong with me. I’m fine. You’ve admitted you’re not. I just said I hope you get better. Admitting you’re sick is step 1, after acknowledging that threatening to spit on babies isn’t ok.
Hope you get better.
Go fuck your whore mother
But you aren’t fine lol…5 days of that shit you fucking wacko
And again, I know you sucked Bigfoot’s cock…Stop lying (wanna make it into a 5 day, 300 post argument bratty cunt?)
What a runt! Translated…“people are mean to me and I’m special!”
FIFY
I have an amazing story from when I was 18 where I did something similar. Sometimes they need to be told.
Do tell…mine wasn’t special. I was hammered, got arrested, asked for my phone call and he said something like no…told him to go fuck himself and he slammed my head into a brick wall a few times…gave me a concussion. Lesson learned…might be why I don’t have more than 2 beers, ever, anymore.
I’d love to read this.
I work with a former cop and he was telling me stories. We were talking about some of the very undesirable things cops have to do as part of their jobs. He said when there’s a drunk naked guy passed out in your backyard, are you going to get him? I don’t want to get him. But you call me and I have to. 
Buddy of mine also told a story of a time a friend of his got drunk on the French quarter and punched a police horse in the face.
And yes, he did break his hand as a result.
Damn! That’s Blazing Saddles style
Indeed. Obviously it didn’t end well for him.
Have another buddy who was driving (drunk) home - cop lit him up - he told the cop that he thought if he could make it home before the cop pulled him over he’d be fine.
He ended up wrecking and they pulled him out of the passenger window. Doesn’t remember any of it. He got extremely lucky and was able to plead down to a simple DUI vs that and felony evasion.
It’s a funny story now but he’s lucky he didn’t kill anyone. Lost a friend to a drunk driver years back. Completely avoidable if you’re even remotely smart.
Closest I ever came was years back visiting a friend out of town. Party at her apartment. About half the party was smoking weed (I wasn’t - I swear - but doesn’t matter - guilt by association).
My idiot friend accidentally called 911 and hung up. 3 cops knock on the door 20 minutes later. I open the door and it’s like a Cheech and Chong movie - smoke wafting out of her place. By some miracle we were able to talk our way out of it all - I suppose the cops had bigger fish to fry that night.
One time in high school I got pulled over by 5 cops and a helicopter - they were apparently looking for a break in suspect and my car happened to be in the area.
Luckily for me I had an alibi - as I was wearing a tuxedo taking my Jr prom date home - so - unless they suspected that I was some kind of James Bond perp, they let me go.
Now that I think about it I may have told it before.
NYC. 1999/2000 and I’m like 18 or 19 years old. I’d been going through a rough time from a recent break up so I was all depressed. Anyway we’re on Mulberry Street at a dive bar…. I’m hammered. And when I say hammered I mean I probably would have blown 2-3 times over the limit. I have this weird obsession with Tequila and I can drink it like I drink water…. And that night I did.
Bill comes, it’s like $2000 for about 12 of us. Everyone is ok with it accept for one of my friends and he starts bitching and moaning. He didn’t drink that much. He’s not paying it. So now he’s being obnoxious because he’s the guy who we all drove around everywhere and did a million gratuitous favors for and mind you this kids dad is loaded and he gets whatever he wants…. So I had enough of the whining. I basically tell him to stop being a pussy. We’re all splitting it. That’s the agreement. We start arguing. He gets a little nasty back. I go at him, face to face…. We’re on Mulberry now and it’s shoulder to shoulder. Can’t even move.
So a cop sees us. Approaches and tries to get in between us to tell us to keep moving. We basically ignore the guy and keep arguing and it’s getting heated. The cop grabs my shoulder in an attempt to separate me and spin me to push me forward. I turn to him and say “get your fucking hands off of me. I didn’t do anything wrong. I know my rights.” He backs off but you can tell he’s annoyed.
Now me and my friend are arguing down the street walking to get our car from an Icon Parking Garage. The arguing intensifies and now we’re standing in the middle of the garage obstructing the cars from leaving. So the parking attendant comes up and is extremely aggressive grabbing us and yelling… so I told him to get the fuck out of my face and he didn’t like it. So now he’s arguing with me and I say to him “it’s no my fault that you ended up as a parking attendant in life.” So that sets this guy off and he takes a swing at me. I slip it, and one shot him. Dropped. He’s down. He gets up, swings, I slip it, I drop him again. This happens about 4 more times. A crowd emerges and watches us go at it. And I’m just abusing this clown. Now his team there jumps me. One has a nightstick, the other has a blade. So now my friends jump in. It’s ducking west side story in the middle of a NYC Parking Garage in Little Italy.
We handle them. It’s over. We win. But now I’m exhausted to the point of failure (this fight was about 12-15 minutes long)…. And now I hear sirens and someone is like “the cops!” So I duck out and start trying to leave so I can hide. I make it about a block and a half and I see a bush to my right. I’m done. I have no more juice. I slip into the bush hoping no one sees and I’ll just hang out until it’s over. Next thing I know I hear “there he is.!” And they pull me out.
And wouldn’t you know it the guy who pulled me out is the same cop that I motherfucked 30 minutes prior. I had people telling him “he was attacked, they tried to stab him!” He didn’t care. He told everyone to mind their own business.
Brings me to some local station to book me and throws me in the tombs in central booking in Manhattan for 3 days.
These pricks wouldn’t let me clean myself. I was covered in this other man’s blood for 2 days. It probably helped me because no one messed with me. They must have thought I committed a murder. Drenched. Even my jacket was soaked. Hands…. Everything.
They (the cops) called me Mike Tyson for 2 days.
6 months later I went to NYC to see the judge. The guy I beat up never showed. I think I traumatized the guy. Apparently they said his lips looked like chopped meat when it was all over.
I’ve got 50 stories like this. My youth was fucking insane.
You dropped the dude 4-5 times? Guy must have had a hell of a chin anyway.
You can’t make that shit up.
Thanks for that. You hadn’t told that story that I remember.
My cousin got taken in for beating the shit out of a guy (turns out he was defending a woman so they eventually dropped the charges). But he stayed in jail for 3 days. Not because he couldn’t bail himself out - he was too afraid to call his mom. He knew he was safer in jail. He finally calls. His brother answers, asks where he is, told him he’s in jail and just starts laughing at him.
Needless to say, mom wasn’t happy.
I give him credit. He was like a zombie. And I’m not lying when I say I dropped him. I thought the first time he was asleep. It was insane.
Central Booking in nyc is a scary place. They bring you deep underground. It’s like a labrynth. And then they move you from cell to cell up and up until you make it to your arraignment.
And that last 200 feet of real estate before you reach the court they walk you straight through a block of cells that’s packed with a bunch of lunatics. Guys are trying to reach at you. Yelling obscenities. I think they are trying to give you the message “don’t come back here.”
I was an out of control teen/young man. Didn’t really care about the consequences of my actions. It wasn’t until I became a father where I calmed down a bit and put everything into perspective.
Lots of nights that could have went the other way and thank god they didn’t.
Funny thing is when I was in that cell I waited to make my phone call. I almost wanted to be alone for a while. And my phone call was to a female friend of mine to tell her to call my brother to come get me. And when this motherfucker shows up he starts with me instantly right outside the court house. I almost fought him right then and there too lol. He was even crazier than me (which is why I called him;he’d understand I thought) and this mfr has the nerve to get on his high horse talking about “I know you started it, what did you do.” Lol.
Wild story. Sounds terrible. I’d be horrified to be in a jail in NYC.
Ask @dallascanes about the time we nearly got into a bloodbath with the starting OU offensive line. When one went to the parking lot to get a gun, we realized we might be in more trouble than we thought. Thank God he never came back
Yeah…sounds terrifying.
Jesus. Where we’re y’all? Was this a TX OU game?
That’s what’s scary. I’ve interviewed people before for jobs - I remember one guy interviewing to be a truck driver (I was the HR person for a logistics company in Houston before heading home to FL). Guy had been out for a couple years but did at least 15 for involuntary manslaughter. Said a bunch of his buddies and him were drinking at a bar - got into it with a bunch of other guys….spills out into the parking lot - and he kills a guy (don’t remember if it was a gun or knife).
How easily things can slip away….